tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post3567658827756373985..comments2024-01-12T00:48:48.031-06:00Comments on Go Teen Writers: Editing the Action Scene: Seven Ways to Make it StrongerStephanie Morrillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13128389560727867719noreply@blogger.comBlogger23125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-44933442430268113772015-10-01T09:14:26.078-05:002015-10-01T09:14:26.078-05:00I'm not starting the story yet, when the world...I'm not starting the story yet, when the world is only half made, but I think I should remember this, and maybe this also makes my fanfics better! :)Erdarielhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17464253149120116126noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-59146763506458744472012-04-08T11:37:41.648-05:002012-04-08T11:37:41.648-05:00You're welcome, Michelle! I'm glad it was ...You're welcome, Michelle! I'm glad it was useful!<br />:-)<br />JillJill Williamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11943570354349667196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-85334592817919866602012-04-08T11:37:20.611-05:002012-04-08T11:37:20.611-05:00Thanks, Jazmine! I'm glad it was eye-opening.
...Thanks, Jazmine! I'm glad it was eye-opening.<br />:-)<br />JillJill Williamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11943570354349667196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-29228322197374752382012-04-08T11:36:50.049-05:002012-04-08T11:36:50.049-05:00Precedent is so important, Jenni! It sets up who y...Precedent is so important, Jenni! It sets up who your character is and how they behave. <br /><br />I didn't avoid any books that were similar to mind. I often read books that are similar to mine to keep me immersed in a similar storyworld. And it helps me see if I have any similarities I could change. I don't always change a similarity, but I don't like my book to look like I copied anyone. So I will sometimes change certain things if I catch something very similar. <br /><br />I like to write my book first before I read similar ones so that I don't get swayed by the things I liked in those similar books. Does that make sense? Did that answer your question?Jill Williamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11943570354349667196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-25395974663149353962012-04-08T11:27:00.878-05:002012-04-08T11:27:00.878-05:00Well, "a bloody tango" is telling. The w...Well, "a bloody tango" is telling. The words sound nice, but you're asking your reader know what a "bloody tango" looks like. And most won't exactly know. You want to show it instead. And you might think it sounds boring or tedious at first, but that's okay. You can edit it later so that it reads smoothly.<br /><br />I like to start out by writing the step-by-step actions, then editing that later so that it flows. So close your eyes and think through the movements your two characters make.<br /><br />Ex: <br /> Villain raises his sword and steps toward Hero. "Let's end this."<br /> "Gladly." Hero draws his sword.<br /> Villain lunges forward, swinging his blade in an arc aimed for Hero's neck. Hero lifts his sword to block and the force rattles his arms. He steps back to get room to swing, but Villain comes at him again, snipping at him like a gardener trimming a hedge.<br /> Hero runs back a few steps and manages to get himself balanced in time to meet Villain's next blow.<br /><br />And you write the sequence of events until you're done. Then you can go back in and add feeling and the other senses, trim things out. Cut any cliches that managed to get in there and rework metaphors you may not like. For example, if you're Hero is a girl, she might think of a barber snipping at hair over a gardener. So make sure your metaphors and descriptions match who your point of view character is.<br /><br />Hope this helps!<br /><br />:-)<br /><br />JillJill Williamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11943570354349667196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-76952231586388594912012-04-08T10:22:08.580-05:002012-04-08T10:22:08.580-05:00Great story about your brother! And excellent poin...Great story about your brother! And excellent point about how it pulls readers out of the story. That's exactly what we don't want to have happen, huh?<br />:-)<br />JillJill Williamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11943570354349667196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-83620039006991015982012-04-07T22:27:21.090-05:002012-04-07T22:27:21.090-05:00Thanks! I'll be sure to file this away in my w...Thanks! I'll be sure to file this away in my writing brain:) Very useful information, can't wait for the next one!Michelle L.noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-91801293902268408892012-04-07T14:02:42.230-05:002012-04-07T14:02:42.230-05:00WOW... this was eye opening! I'm a fantasy wri...WOW... this was eye opening! I'm a fantasy writer too so this helped sooo much, I'll have to hone my action-writing skills and apply it to some sword fighting and grappling I have in my books!Jazmine~https://www.blogger.com/profile/06246960020080246030noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-6260132555401400182012-04-07T00:08:40.557-05:002012-04-07T00:08:40.557-05:00Great info!
Had me worried for a minute when you m...Great info!<br />Had me worried for a minute when you mentioned Achan tackling his opponent, because I had one of my characters do that in a fight, too. But then God reminded me of a ballgame early in my story where the character tackled that same person. Precedent. =)<br /><br />When you wrote, were there any books you specifically avoided because of similarities to yours?Jenni Gallagherhttp://fictionalboundaries.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-24457892833461590392012-04-06T21:59:57.478-05:002012-04-06T21:59:57.478-05:00Thanks, Ms Williamson! It's really helpful, th...Thanks, Ms Williamson! It's really helpful, though i still have some questions...<br />I had a problem describing the sequences of the fighting action, like I'm writing about two guys locked in a fight. How do I describe it without making it boring, too tedious for the reader, and yet delivers a clear image?<br />I tried describing my swordfight into a bloddy tango...but I just don't think it's clear enough, and failed to give the necessary excitement and adrealine...<br />Thanks very much anyway!RaeAnnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05104497191718471812noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-24797957372641348912012-04-06T18:16:16.691-05:002012-04-06T18:16:16.691-05:00What a great post! Thanks so much! I'd like ...What a great post! Thanks so much! I'd like to add/agree that it really is important to research your action scenes. I remember once watching a Zoro movie with my brother who was on a competitive tumbling team. Zoro goes running along the roof tops and garden walls, and at some point does a roll (or maybe it was a front flip?). Anyway, my brother looks at it and says "Why would you roll like that," he said. "It'll just slow you down." It made me realize that although I didn't know the difference, the illogicalness of the move pulled my brother, who did know the difference, out of the story, making it harder for him to enjoy it. It's important to check your fight scenes with someone who does this stuff (a friend who fences, a blackbelt cousin, or a sister who does cheer), to make sure you don't have any inconsistencies that could spoil the story for someone else. Brothers and their friends who are addicted to star wars movies can occasionally be helpful, since they use the moves in both scripted and unscripted fights (the brothers, not the actors);)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-41321936039559880372012-04-06T15:40:37.628-05:002012-04-06T15:40:37.628-05:00Thanks, Rachelle! :-)
In my medieval books, Vrell...Thanks, Rachelle! :-)<br /><br />In my medieval books, Vrell (my noblewoman who was dressed as a boy), could hardly fight with a sword at first. But she got better because she had to. And Achan was a good teacher. *grin*Jill Williamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11943570354349667196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-76772210823518541052012-04-06T15:39:09.161-05:002012-04-06T15:39:09.161-05:00You're very welcome!
I'd ask him what go...You're very welcome! <br /><br />I'd ask him what goes through his head when he's fighting. And what might be different in a competitive match vs a real battle. He'd have to imagine, I would guess. But his answers could be very helpful.<br /><br />I'd also ask him to describe his motions out loud. I recall reading a novel where the characters fought with rapiers, and the main character often held his weapon in the position of "prime." And there were other positions such as first, second, etc. If fencing has such terms, you'll want to learn them well. Ask how he describes different offensive and defensive moves.<br /><br />I bet the Karate did help! And you understand what it takes to really want to attack someone, which will help all of your different characters. That's cool, Leila. <br />:-)<br /><br />JillJill Williamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11943570354349667196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-70203993196649073082012-04-06T15:35:00.517-05:002012-04-06T15:35:00.517-05:00Thanks, Allison!
:-)Thanks, Allison!<br />:-)Jill Williamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11943570354349667196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-34673591204827916802012-04-06T15:29:23.504-05:002012-04-06T15:29:23.504-05:00That's a good idea for a post, Sarah. Maybe I&...That's a good idea for a post, Sarah. Maybe I'll write a post for magical battles and one for all out wars. A war can be intimidating. Good idea. :-)<br /><br />JillJill Williamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11943570354349667196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-89754306055183682852012-04-06T15:28:14.213-05:002012-04-06T15:28:14.213-05:00:-):-)Jill Williamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11943570354349667196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-11912248014861386502012-04-06T15:28:00.062-05:002012-04-06T15:28:00.062-05:00Thanks, Lauren!
I hope you already had a fight sce...Thanks, Lauren!<br />I hope you already had a fight scene planned. :-)<br />JillJill Williamsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11943570354349667196noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-30255766146604877012012-04-06T14:58:41.963-05:002012-04-06T14:58:41.963-05:00I loved your tough girl comments. I just loved how...I loved your tough girl comments. I just loved how Gabi in the River of Time series fought with a sword...but never came across as super-girl or anything. :) <br /><br />Thank you for this post! Engrossing!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06150136011032761640noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-70373679682311683162012-04-06T12:04:23.900-05:002012-04-06T12:04:23.900-05:00This is exactly what I needed! Thanks a million Ji...This is exactly what I needed! Thanks a million Jill! I have a couple people I need to talk to for tips. I have a friend who takes fencing lessons. Do you have any tips for what questions to ask him?<br /><br />I took three years of karate, however I hated sparring people. I just liked the drills and head knowledge. :) Its not my nature to attack people I suppose. Though it has helped me a lot in my writing! Anytime I have hand to hand combat.Leilanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-45910317351111139932012-04-06T10:07:22.878-05:002012-04-06T10:07:22.878-05:00Really fascinating! Like the tips from the pro fig...Really fascinating! Like the tips from the pro fighers. :)Allisonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05433338978586263492noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-81083613864857506722012-04-06T07:41:37.546-05:002012-04-06T07:41:37.546-05:00I found this post great, even though I don't h...I found this post great, even though I don't have any physical fights in my stories. Yet.<br />I would also love to have a post on larger scale battles like in Return of the King and stuff like that. I'm going to writing one of those pretty soon and it's really intimidating me.<br />Thanks for posting, Ms. Williamson!<br />~Sarah F.<br /><br />www.inklinedwriters.blogspot.comSarah Faulknerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00244256396217402116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-25908053551559746032012-04-06T06:31:49.139-05:002012-04-06T06:31:49.139-05:00Good to know...I'll keep this in mind (I'l...Good to know...I'll keep this in mind (I'll probably need it in my next WIP) :DOlivia Smithttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06248659353869417682noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4024721400572472213.post-65641265640819092732012-04-06T01:18:20.652-05:002012-04-06T01:18:20.652-05:00Now I really want to go try these tips out in my o...Now I really want to go try these tips out in my own WIP. :)Laurenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15292139796803739003noreply@blogger.com